Aaron Rodgers Is MVP Honors, Cam Newton Is Honorable Mention, And Tom Brady Is GOAT

Sunday Football came as a necessary entertainment break from the tragic events worldwide including terrorist attacks in international cities, Beirut, and Paris. Every game held a moment of silence for the victims, including Lambeau Field. That’s when some jackass chose to yell “muslims suck!”, with the timing of a Congressman yelling “you lie”.

Well, Green Bay QB heard that and called the fan out:

You get the MVP Award of the week, champ.

 

Now CAM… you undefeated, juggernaut of a man-child you! I say “Man-Child” referring to almighty Cam because of how much he is man-handling defenses on the line of scrimmage, and INSTANTLY followin that up with being delightfully (unless you’re a defense tryna stop him) childish EVERY TIME. Watch and laugh:

and Tom Brady?

Continue reading Aaron Rodgers Is MVP Honors, Cam Newton Is Honorable Mention, And Tom Brady Is GOAT

The Frightnrs – Admiration (Cadenza & Toddla T Remix)

NUCCAAAAA. This dat TURN UP RIGHT HERE, BOY! WHAT! Somebody get me the acapella to that “Trap Queen” song I hate, so I can remix it to this joint real quick! This make me wanna punch somebody’s grandma at the grocery line so I can quickly deliver sprinkles to those orphans I promised at that ice-cream truck a bit ago. (grandma took too long gettin change from her purse) When get there, I’m gonna make it RAIN sprinkles even where there ain’t no ice cream. Then this beat will drop. Then everything will be slow-mo, including the high-five from the understanding grand-ma when she catches up to me. But, don’t punish me for it yet… I didn’t DOOOOOO!

Pardon Me While I Search Engine Optimize, Tom Brady

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If you came here for content, turn around and get the fuck out now, bro. Because this is allllllll Tom Brady all the time up in here! WE’RE TALKING FOUR RINGS FOR FREEDOM BABY! Tom Brady is a free man. FREE. Minus the cost of lawyers, bitches.

It’s time to celebrate and ride that pretty boy’s coattails. Let’s search engine optimize the fuck out of this blog!

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Ugh, yeah, give me those clicks. CLICK ME GOOD, BABY! CLICK ME SO GOOD. CLICK ME GOOD-ELL!

Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell Roger Goodell.

THAT’S RIGHT MOTHAFUCKERS, GOOGLE THAT SHIT. COME TO PAPA. YOU KNOW YOU WANT IT. DON’T DEFLATEGATE ME, DARLING.

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Ugh, didn’t that feel nice? You want more? YOU WANT THESE FOOTBALLS, DON’T CHA? DON’T YOU WISH YOUR BALLGHAZI BLOG WAS OPTIMIZED LIKE ME (DONTCHA)?

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NFL! Courts! New England Patriots! Victory! Super Bowl! Cheaters! Scandal! Deflated! Footballs! Ball boys! Appeal! Suspension! Four Games! FUCK YEAH, THAT’S THE GOOD SHIT RIGHT THERE, GIVE IT ALL TO ME. GIVE ME ALL YOUR KEYWORDS YOU DIRTY FOOTBALL CHEATING FUCKBOYS!

I’mma go tag the shit out of this post now. TOM BRADY, BITCHES. Tom Brady.

Gronk, Why So Genuine And Behaved? CUT IT OUT!

I don’t like this, Gronk. I don’t like it ONE BIT! Congrats on the comeback award, you know we love ya for it. But last night at the Espys.. What was THAT?

You were poised, calm, collected, well spoken? WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?

Gronk I… Gronk I don’t know how to say this… but, you didn’t make me wanna spike a single object around me… NOT ONE! That moment had NO bromanship WHAT. SO. EVER. Are you growin up, and becoming and adult on us, Gronk? Listen, if you’re NOT gonna pop mollys and twerk on ESPN’s Jemele Hill at Kentucky Derbys, party till your pants literally rip off, or generally ball overtly like the world is in the palm of your hands ready for spiking – we’re gonna need you to let us know RIGHT NOW! But, before you make any rash decisions, ROB, I want you to THINK.

Think of who you’re ROBbing here, ROB! Think of the Pats Nation you leave in mid-spike-limbo with our collective breaths held for the slam of the ground. Think ROB! Think of the blah blah blah. But Rob, that’s not enough. I want you to close your eyes and think, Rob. I want you to think of those shoulder pads barely phased by the chumps you just bulldozed past into the end-zone. KEEP YOUR EYES CLOSED, ROB! Think of the NOIZE YOU CAN’T IGNORE! Don’t worry, this isn’t a concussion test, you’re fine. Think of Foxborough in an absolute FRENZY, Rob! All those Dunkin Donut Coffee crazed, clam-chowder slurpin, relentless Patriots in the stands backed by the best owner in Football.

Then I want you to look at who’s running up from the line of scrimmage to meet you after that spike, Rob! You see those boyband locks bouncin your way on the shoulders of the greatest quarterback of all time, don’t you? DON’T YOU! That’s your teammate, Rob! That’s your QUARTERBACK, ROB! LOOK AT THOSE BIG BLUE EYES OF PURE AMERICA! Thats… That’s Tom. Do you see Tom, Rob? Rob see Tom run. Tom sees Rob run. Tom’s not lookin for a high-five, Rob. That’s not for champions. Tom’s WAY too pumped his boy just Gronked the world again. Tom’s comin your way for one reason and one reason only. Point to your chest, Rob. Now smack your forehead, Rob. That’s what Tom wants, Rob. He’s comin in for his signature head-bump that will get you closer to that concussion than any of those floozy linebackers could. Are you gonna leave him hangin, Rob? Are you gonna let that man down, to rest easy on his signature Ugg boots without earning that comfort from knocking one hardworking Bellichick-bred noggin against another?
That’s what I want you to think about, Rob. Dry your eyes, Rob. I think we both know how you’re gonna act from now on. You’re the Comeback Player of the Year. You can comeback from this sudden bout of unbecoming professionals

Turnip Tuesday: Gronk & Big Papi – “Sippin” (Summer Chillin)

I’ll TRY. I’ll TRY to introduce this. I’ll TRY to mentally prepare you for Rob Gronkowski and David Ortiz pool partying in the Bahston Summer while drinking Dunkin Donuts coffee. I’ll TRY. This isn’t easy, man.

Look, I’ll ghost-write you a break-up note. 30 MINUTES FLAT! Need a draft for your resignation letter. NO PROBLEM. I’ll even try to tackle race-relations in America (which this video probably has some answers to). But this?

gronk and pap record benandsiyablog

The harmonized autotuning by the Boston Red Sock, and the New England Patriot? The bromantic tandem bike-ride released the day before “National Best Friend Day“?  AND.THAT. CUP-SOLO… OH GAWD, THAT CUP SOLO.

papi cup solo benandsiyablog

You CAN NOT unhear it, and you will never look at your coffee, straw or your life in general the same.  I’m sorry and you’re welcome for this.  I hope you’re sippin for the TURNIP TUESDAY!

Watch 4 Reactions To 4 Time Superbowl Winning Deflategate Troubles

{If you get nothing else from this post, you should leave with some perspective what Deflategate means to New England, the NFL, and the integrity of the great game of Football from THIS Comprehensive Site aptly named “YOURTEAMCHEATS.COM}

Four is the magic number for this hammer NFL dropped on the Patriots this week. 4 Game Suspension upon Tom Brady the beginning of next season. This after winning his 4th Superbowl by 4 Points. How many quarter-millions were the Patriots fined? 4 of them, adding up to $1 Million Dollars.  In a beautiful ending to the suspension, guess who the first game back is for the future Hall of Famer?  Thaaat’s right, Indianapolis Colts. If you recall, that’s the same crew that raised concerns of losing due to cheating via deflated footballs to start this whole fiasco. Good for them, that 45-7 loss really deflated their hopeful spirits of breaking the domination streak Tom Brady has had over them since 2012.

Until then, join us in laughing at the Continue reading Watch 4 Reactions To 4 Time Superbowl Winning Deflategate Troubles

Top 10 Best/Worst Meme Reactions To Aaron Hernandez Guilty Verdict

Full Disclosure: As a New England Patriots fan, I stayed fairly ignorant of the details of the curious case of Aaron Hernandez. I was a lot more concerned about how it affects my team’s Super Bowl chances than, you know…murder. Frankly, after the year of scandals and nonsense the NFL had in 2014 – I became numb to the bull$hit. So much so, that I only learned this last week, when the guilty verdict was announced, that this monster also had a DOUBLE HOMICIDE on his rap-sheet. He also shot a friend in the face, while riding on the highway, after an altercation in a Florida strip-club. Some of these could be explained by a rough-upbringing in a gang-infested environment, but this nucca KILT somebody (allegedly several)… WHILE IN THE NFL! I’m not talking ‘drunk-driving-accidental kill‘… I’m talkin pre-meditated, hide the weapon after, then party with a clear conscious murder. WHAT TYPE OF $HIT? HOW did he get in the NFL and in such close proximity to Tom Brady all these years!?!?

Well, the internet doesn’t leave much room for this type of reflection. Only shock-value, no-chill, undeniably hilarious (but downright childish),  and super-insensitive memes.  Without further adieu, here’s the Top 10: Continue reading Top 10 Best/Worst Meme Reactions To Aaron Hernandez Guilty Verdict