This beet reminds me of this dude I used to know, but I’m having a hard time remembering his name. I know it started with like a vowel or a consonant though. God, what was it? We totally went to middle school or high school or college together. Or maybe it was work? Either way, he was sort of this smallish tall, skinnier dude with a bit of heft. Light-dark hair. Like really forgettably memorable, you know? Always there with the crowd, doing his own thing kind of guy. He had street smarts or book smarts but not the other, or maybe both. Do you know who I’m talking about?
Oh come on, I know you know the guy I’m talking about! The dude with the face? Two ears, mouth, eyes? Ate food for lunch? Used his arms all the time? Relied on legs to walk? Wore shirts and pants? Bled blood? Nothing? Come on! Help me out here. This beet is exactly like that guy was! I need his name so I can rock this wicked, tangled spidering root of an analogy about how their under-the-radar prominence really distinguished them, allowing them to hide away unnoticed. You know what I mean?
That guy was EXACTLY like this beet, always clean with a little bit of dirt. He was always kind of a funny, solemn guy, rocking indifferent passion about things and such? Ugh, still nada? I feel like we’re getting nowhere with this. You really can’t remember that dude? You’re not being much help here, my disembodied reader of taproot rooted blog posts friend. I’m trying to really unlock the mystery of the beet for you, opening your eyes to our bulb borscht bubbler. But I can’t do that without that one guy’s name. You know, the guy from the earlier paragraphs who used to that thing at that place? You know? No?
Well damn. I guess this beet has the upper hand. It doesn’t need to rely on names or memories. It just exists, being itself. Popularly unpopular. Just like that guy… or wait, girl? Well shit, that might be the problem. I think I was thinking of a chick this whole time. Yeah, she was definitely female if she wasn’t male! Long-short hair? Hey, wait! Where are you going? We can figure this out! We’re almost to a great blog post! ALL WE NEED IS THAT NAME!