I’ll TRY. I’ll TRY to introduce this. I’ll TRY to mentally prepare you for Rob Gronkowski and David Ortiz pool partying in the Bahston Summer while drinking Dunkin Donuts coffee. I’ll TRY. This isn’t easy, man.
Look, I’ll ghost-write you a break-up note. 30 MINUTES FLAT! Need a draft for your resignation letter. NO PROBLEM. I’ll even try to tackle race-relations in America (which this video probably has some answers to). But this?
The harmonized autotuning by the Boston Red Sock, and the New England Patriot? The bromantic tandem bike-ride released the day before “National Best Friend Day“? AND.THAT. CUP-SOLO… OH GAWD, THAT CUP SOLO.
You CAN NOT unhear it, and you will never look at your coffee, straw or your life in general the same. I’m sorry and you’re welcome for this. I hope you’re sippin for the TURNIP TUESDAY!