Watch Russian Soldier’s Social Media Posts Totally Blow Ukranian Invasion Secret

“…the digital and literal footprints of one Russian soldier…prove that Russian soldiers are fighting in Ukraine.”

Disclaimer: Not here to argue the political facts and consequences, we haven’t opened that can of worms yet. We’re barely touching technology on this blog as of late. But, here’s some meaningful context. Former 4-Star General, Welsey Clark was both head of United States European Command, AND Supreme Commander of NATO forces. When it comes to Ukraine, Crimea, and the general phuckery Russia has been “allegedly” inflicting in the area – he can be considered an expert voice.  He recently warned that Russia is planning a Spring Offensive to further seize more sovereign territory from embattled and fractured Ukraine.
A couple of days ago we reported on the ISIS “moron” who tweeted his location, completely blowing his cover in a battle – and had a bit of fun with that, right along with the Air Force guys. Now this? SO, LET’S RECAP!

World leader most likely goes for hegemonic land-grab in neighboring Ukraine. CHECK. World leader flat-out denies such doings (under the cover of sloppy guerilla tactics). SURE. World community goes ahead and freezes his economic power into tailspin recession anyway, just in case – ya know – HE’S CLEARLY LYING. CHECK. The international waltz of crisis ensues, and continues to the day of this posting. That is until the good folks over at Vice News popped into one of Russia’s most popular Social Networks and noticed a young G.I. Jakov left his geo-tags on.  Sooo all they had to do was follow those digital breadcrumbs to young tweeter’s posting history, and what do you know? Massive troop incursions right on the border, waiting for orders from Moscow!

Russian President Vladimir has unequivocally denied these allegations.  Nonetheless, the international community led by the United States has imposed tough sanctions on the Russian economy, including Russian oligarchy’s funds worldwide – some of Putin’s strongest and most wealthy billionaire supporters (guys who made a killing in the Sochi Olympics). The general idea is, you can’t eat ya lunch – until you release the headlock you have on that Ukranian kid in your part of the playground.

While you may deny such wrong-doing, your homeboy is live-tweeting the scuffle for us, VLAD! That’s 2015. “The Shot heard around the World” was for the American Revolution.  Not too far from there in Sarajevo, an Archbishop’s assassination tindered World War 1. Will the next major conflict be sparked by the inevitability of somebody pressing “post” on their mobile phone at the wrong time and place?


Potato Of The Day Episode 51

dyingbananaYo Banana, you okay dude? You’re not looking good. You’ve got… spots. Like a lot of them. It’s disconcerting. Oh, what’s that? You think you’ve always looked that way? You know I know that’s not true. You don’t need to lie to me. It’s going to be okay. Well, actually it’s not, Banana. Let’s be real with each other right now. Let’s not skirt the subject any longer. You’re dying. You are. I’m sorry. You know you’re my bronana. I didn’t want it to be the case.  But it’s true.

I know it’s hard to hear with you being an inanimate object with no ears and all, but those spots, those grimly grown skin shadows, those moldy marbled marks, are tattooed fingerprints from the Grim Reaper’s hand. Death’s coming for you, Banana. Now, now… shhh… Don’t feel so bad. Death comes for us all.

Sure, there are plenty of ways we could fight Father Time, Banana. We could blend ourselves up into drinks, pasty purees sans decaying skin, stored away from the sweltering summertime countertop. But… honestly, that might SHORTEN your shelf life, dude.  I listen to a lot of hip hop. I know how thirsty hoes are these days. And, being honest here, I’m not really down to get blended. That’s going overboard with the moral support. I guess we could wrap ourselves in bubble wrap, shielding away from polluted oxygen and the rest of the world. You and me together. Bubble Boy and Bubble Banana! But… I don’t really like the feeling of plastic. I like fresh air. So maybe not that. There’s always the freezer? But cryogenics are fucking iffy at best. I don’t trust that dark magic.

This isn’t looking good, Banana. We’re pretty much out of options. Well there is ONE option… You’re not going to like it though.  So, uh, dude, completely hypothetically, how do you feel about euthanasia? Don’t look at me like that Banana! I’m not trying to be crass here, but let’s not let your life go to waste! What do you mean I wouldn’t want to eat something that looks like you? Of course I’d still nibble that nanner ass even with your bubonic spots! That’s for real, Banana. That’s a bro having another bro’s back. There’s nothing wrong with the sweet release of death, especially if it brings ME a little more life. So, like, can I eat you? I know you can’t actually answer that as, again, you’re inanimate. So I’m going to give myself power of attorney here and answer it for you: “K”.

Oh Banana, you always did love a good potassium pun! Rest in digested pieces, my freshly peeled friend.

Turnip Tuesday: Gronk & Big Papi – “Sippin” (Summer Chillin)

I’ll TRY. I’ll TRY to introduce this. I’ll TRY to mentally prepare you for Rob Gronkowski and David Ortiz pool partying in the Bahston Summer while drinking Dunkin Donuts coffee. I’ll TRY. This isn’t easy, man.

Look, I’ll ghost-write you a break-up note. 30 MINUTES FLAT! Need a draft for your resignation letter. NO PROBLEM. I’ll even try to tackle race-relations in America (which this video probably has some answers to). But this?

gronk and pap record benandsiyablog

The harmonized autotuning by the Boston Red Sock, and the New England Patriot? The bromantic tandem bike-ride released the day before “National Best Friend Day“?  AND.THAT. CUP-SOLO… OH GAWD, THAT CUP SOLO.

papi cup solo benandsiyablog

You CAN NOT unhear it, and you will never look at your coffee, straw or your life in general the same.  I’m sorry and you’re welcome for this.  I hope you’re sippin for the TURNIP TUESDAY!