WE WENT ZERO TO ONE HUNDRED [REDACTED BY SIYA BECAUSE WE BOTH AGREE I SHOULDN’T BE USING THAT WORD EVEN THOUGH IN THIS INSTANCE IT WOULD BE A QUOTE AND MAYBE THAT’S ACCEPTABLE USAGE, BUT THEN AGAIN I DIDN’T ACTUALLY USE ANY QUOTATION MARKS SO IT’S NOT REALLY A QUOTE IT’S JUST ME CO-OPTING HIP HOP CULTURE WHICH IS ARGUABLY PROBLEMATIC IN AND OF ITSELF, OR PERHAPS IT’S NOT IF I’M NOT MISREPRESENTING THE CULTURE, BUT EITHER WAY THIS WORD HAS BEEN REDACTED AND TALKING ABOUT RACE IS PRETTY FUCKING COMPLICATED] REAL QUICK.
Can you believe it? We’ve done 100 posts. WE’RE KEEPING IT ONE HUNDRED RIGHT NOW. Bask in our Benjamin Franklin, our centennial, our Billboard Chart. No one said we couldn’t do it! But no one said we could either! So this is an in-your-face to
our haters the indifferent masses. We’re going to keep bringing you Potatoes Of The Day, and Ben’s Diaries, and Morning Commutes, and oh, hey there Siya, I was just talking about how we’re keeping it 100, and not all just promoting the regular posts that I write. No, no, Siya, you just keep doing what you’re doing, not posting anything on a regularly scheduled basis. Yeah man, it’s cool. People don’t want or expect consistency. Oh, yeah man that listicle post of Aaron Hernandez memes was… great. Really, it was totally… high-brow. Oh, what’s that Siya, you think it’s a little unfair of me to be pretending to have a conversation with you? You think I could have consulted you first before posting something about our 100th post? You think maybe you could have contributed to this more if you were actually co-writing this piece instead of having your part ghost-written by me? WELL I THINK YOU COULD HAVE AT LEAST SENT ME A HUNDRED CONGRATULATORY 100 EMOJIS FOR OUR 100TH POST YOU INSENSITIVE, CELEBRATION HATING ASS.
You guys, 100 posts. THAT’S A LOT MORE THAN ZERO. It’s also a lot less than a million. THIS WHOLE THING HAS ME SO EMOTIONAL THAT I’M GOING TO GO LISTEN TO SOME DRAKE.